We Need To Talk: The Money Conversations Serious Couples Need To Have

Sure, your Zodiac signs may be compatible with one another but have you looked into your financial compatibility with your partner? Having an open and honest conversation about money with your significant other may seem daunting but it’s a great opportunity to learn more about your partner and what the future holds for your relationship.

Contrary to popular belief, the lack of money is not the reason why money or finances turned out to be one of the leading causes of stress in relationships. It’s actually a lack of proper communication. You’ve heard it time and time again–“Communication is key!”–and when it comes to relationships communication is the key to a healthy and thriving relationship. Money may not be the most romantic topic between lovers, but knowing your financial compatibility is crucial to a lasting relationship. 

You must be wondering, “What’s financial compatibility and how do I know if my partner and I are financially compatible?” First and foremost, let’s discuss what financial compatibility isn’t. It isn’t having a partner with the same financial standing as yourself. That is not a requisite for financial compatibility. So no, you don’t need to dump your SO just because of differences in current financial standing. Financial compatibility is more concerned with your individual attitudes and habits surrounding money and whether or not they’re well matched. 

Here are a few prompts you can discuss with your partner to get a better idea of your financial compatibility! 

As Erin Lowry of Broke Millennial once said, “It’s time to get financially naked!” Put it all out in the open–how much you earn, how much you owe, how you spend, and how you save. If your partner is struggling to open up about this, share your financial standing first so your partner can feel more comfortable talking about their own. Reassure your partner that you are a safe space and that they could openly talk about their finances with you sans judgment. Knowing each other’s financial standing can inform the choices you make as a couple. 

As individuals, we have our own personal financial goals that differ from one person to another. Communicate with your partner “So here’s the plan… are you in?” You and your partner may not have the same goals and that’s okay. What’s more important is that you understand the value of your partner’s goals and vice versa. 

You know the path [to your goals] well but this time you’re not alone–this time you have someone who can be by your side to support you and keep you accountable. Ever since you made things official with your SO you made an unspoken commitment to help one another achieve fulfillment in life and, yes, that extends to one’s finances. 

There is no right or wrong answer to this question. It all comes down to preference. Discuss the best option for you and your partner. Listen to each other’s insight and compromise if needed. Joint or separate, your partner’s finances will directly affect yours so it’s best to be mindful about tracking your spending to consider each other’s financial standing.

Our partners limiting beliefs can be a cause of frustration. Talk about each other’s limiting beliefs and try to root out where it comes from and how these beliefs are formed and sustained. As life partners, you can unlearn these limiting beliefs together with patience and compassion. 

Describe to your partner what financial success looks like to you. Is it millions in the bank or is it a sublime investment portfolio? Is it settling in a big home or having the financial freedom to travel the world? Financial success looks different to everyone. It’s important to know your partner's ideals. Best case scenario, your vision of financial success aligns with one another but when in doubt try to meet in the middle. 

There is no “perfect time” to have these conversations with your partner but the sooner you have this discussion the better. The bottom line is when it comes to your finances, you and your partner need to be on the same page to move forward to the next chapter of your relationship. 

You and your partner make a great team! But you’re going to need a game plan to score your financial goals. That’s where we come in. Simply Finance can create a Financial Plan according to the unique goals and aspirations of you and your partner. We love seeing couples thrive together and we want you and your SO to thrive too!